Into the Woods

I have had no good blogs to bring in my general attitude for the new year. I guess I thought that at this point being a parent would be easier, feeling good about myself would come more naturally, and I would know what it is that I am supposed to be doing with my life. Instead, this year has begun like so many other, with confusion, anxiety, distress, and a vague sense of dread. I feel like a negative nelly when I start listing off the bad things, but I feel as though I need to get them out before I can release them and go onto the good. So, the past few weeks have been chaotic:
None of my friends came to my housewarming party
Right after that party my entire plumbing system flooded and I couldn't use my water for several days.
I found out that a lot of my hours at work are being cut back because of the lousy economy.
I got sick with the stomach flu
My daughter fell and split her head open, and I handled it like a complete nutcase by throwing up and crying hysterically.
So, perhaps there is some opportunity for improvement this year. I figure it is only January 8th so I have lot of time to turn this thing around. My first "resolution" is to try to feel more healthy. My fibromyalgia and TMJ have ruled my life for so long, and now I just want to feel good again. I am thinking of starting a little "healthy choices" club with some cool rewards and comradory. If anyone is interested, please let me know! My second resolution is to start really writing again. It has been a long time since I have both written and gone back to edit and improve what I wrote. It is about time that I pay attention to that. Finally, I want this year to reflect a stronger financial plan. I have been so overloaded for so long that I have put nothing in savings and have no idea from month to month what I am doing.

There are a lot of things I can't control. I can't control whether or not I find love again; I can't control exactly how my fibromyalgia is going to affect me; I can't control Gloria being an overwhelming child at times. However, I can get myself in better shape, take time to pray and meditate, eat more healthy choices and find a way to laugh about some of the hard things.

This entry seems really personal and very generic at the same time. Oh well, it's a start. And off I go . . .