Today I had a long conversation with my mother-in-law about Kevin, death, the future, and what is all does or doesn't mean. No matter what you tell yourself, you have times when you feel like you could have somehow prevented what happened to Kevin. I have many regrets, but the moment I run through my head again and again is the phone conversation right before he died. I feel upset that his last moments were alone, not held in my arms holding him, loving him, brushing my fingers through his hair. What kind of wife leaves a man alone when he is self-destructing? Just when I feel I am at rock bottom, I get to snuggle with my Glory and life seems bearable once again.